Redo

Life is funny. There are ups and downs that send us on our way. They teach us about ourselves, and help us grow. I know that with the downs come the ups. That the good comes with the bad. Maybe that's why our bad was so tough. We have had a lot of good in the last year.

We are getting back to normal. Grant is getting back to his normal temperment. He badly wants to be right there with Preston. On the go, and into it all. He has finally stopped flopping back from a sitting position. He now slowly rolls to his side. So, there is less running to see that he didn't flop back and hurt himself.

Preston is working to learn to read. Yikes! We are working with sight words, as he can sound out most words. He has "is, it, if, the, and look" down pat. We play a little game with flashcards, and for each word he doesn't need help with he gets a sanity pill (really dark chocolate covered raisins that I renamed!)

They are blessings that I count everyday, and I am so lucky they chose me. The day to day might exhaust me, but I wouldn't trade a second of it. Well, maybe the vomit. I could do without that.

This week has been hard. It has been the hardest of my mothering experience so far. It was emotionally and physically draining. It started with a cold that Preston and I shared.

Then Brandon started in on it. Then Grant started coughing and sniffling. It was all down hill. It is hard to believe that it has only been 7 days since Grant started. Preston has has lots of colds/ respiratory issues, so he was an old pro, and hardly batted an eye. This was Grant's first illness ever. So he ended up with RSV.

Long story short, it is a respiratory virus that causes mucus to settle in the lungs, and lands some kids in the hospital. There is no worse feeling as a mother, than not having the ability to help your child. Wednesday night this happened to me. Grant's fever was spiking to 102 and nothing was helping him. He was one sick puppy. So I packed him up, and we spent the night in the ER. He slept two hours.

The steroids that he was given helped him, his oxygen levels rose, he calmed down, and was just back to a little miserable.

It has been trying though. He doesn't want anyone other than his mommy. He is hungry, but his tummy is so full from drainage, that he doesn't want to eat. He cries/screams 90% of the day. I have been with him non-stop.

He is so demanding and his older brother has been seriously neglected. It rips my heart out that I don't have the time or energy to be there for him more. I skipped my morning shower one day and played Candy Land for an hour straight so that he got my attention for that hour.

Grant has been so consuming that it has drained me. There is little that makes him happy, even when being held and snuggled, he is sure the grass is greener elsewhere. I hit a breaking point today, and out the door I went.

There is nothing more satisfying to me than be able to wander through stores, and not feel on borrowed time. It was wonderful to feel like I had an identity. I hate to admit it, but I was dreading coming home. I knew what I was coming back to, and that this illness wouldn't have magically disappeared.

There are moments though that cause my breath to catch in my throat and my heart to litterally hurt by the love for these kids, but I need to find better ways to fill my cup back up because I am no good to these boys on empty.

New Year

These boys keep me on my toes. I have been busier than ever the past 7 (almost 8) months. I struggle to balance my time between the two boys, and still fit in laundry, dinners, church activities, preschool obligations, and the rest of life.

Grant is finally starting to sleep a little with more regular naps, and it gives me a mintue to get caught up on things that have been tossed aside for months. It is a little like Heaven to be able to wash, dry and fold a load of laundry!

The littlest has started sitting on his own, and decided to master this little trick Christmas day. He also got his two front teeth before Christmas, so I guess we can put that in the win column! He is rolling all over these days, but will get stuck going one direction until someone goes and gets him and brings him back. He has a temper that is unriveled in this house, and does not hesitate to let you know when you have crossed him.

Preston is learning at an alarming rate. He is able to scrawl all of the alphabet, and has all the sounds down. He is eager to learn to read, and does great sounding out a word, and then being able to recognize it through a book. It is hard to believe that in a year he will be reading. I don't think I was reading until first grade.

I hate that I haven't recorded the end of last year better, but my resolution for this year is to keep up better, and post something at least three times a week. Even if it is a two second blurb about how busy we are. I have forgotten so much about Preston as a baby, and I regret that. So I vow to do better. I know Brandon is probably cringing because that will mean I will need time on the computer, but this is important!

We talked to Preston about all the exciting things that were going to happen this year. He is going to turn FIVE! Grant will turn ONE! He will go to Kindergarten, Grant will learn to walk. We will go to the beach. He will learn to swim all by himself. It is going to be a big year. Happy 2012!

Picture overload!

This is going to be post one of a bazillion to add all the pictures that have been patiently waiting on my camera! Sorry if the cuteness is overwhelming.

field trip to the park. The other kid was much larger, and he got to "fly!"

They love to do everything together... for now.

I can't tell you how many mornings I have found him doing this.

two fingers, just like mom.

My sunglasses are apparently fair game, but has anyone seen them, I miss them.

The corn box at the pumpkin patch.

The never ending corn maze, that we ended up cheating to get out...

Waiting for the tractor.

Yes, we had snow before Halloween, and have yet to get more. But that's fine.

I promise there are more pictures, but Grant woke up, Preston wants a snack (at 9:15) and Grant needs to get back down for a nap. Wish me luck!

Falling

Disclaimer: This post was started on my birthday, yep, November 30th. Shameful to let things sit that long, and memories fade. Also, I guess blogger is mad at me for being away so long, and will not let me add any other photos, other than the one below, and it will only let me place it there. Yay! That is all.

Wow! Look how bald he was!

Fall blew past us straight into the holidays! Grant has consumed so much of my time I have little time for anything else. But that is the way I want it. I want to spend my time focused on my family. Even if it means that I don't have time to type about every moment. I do want to get better though. I have found that you can order books that are your blog, so instead of trying to scrapbook everything when "the kids are in school" I plan to order a book!

Fall kept us busy with craft shows and football and friends. It was very temperamental with really cold days and really warm days. We even had a measurable snowfall before Halloween.

We didn't do much, but I think in my determinedness to be done Christmas shopping by Thanksgiving (which I accomplished a day after) I made fall busier. This means though that I can sit back and relax through the holidays. I am so looking forward to that!

Preston's preschool had the cutest Halloween party. I had the sweetest little Hokie Bird, and football. Preston, of course, changed his mind about 100 times on what he wanted to dress up as for Halloween. Thank goodness we have connections to people that have sewing machines! His costume was amazing!

Grant mastered rolling onto his tummy and has finally gotten comfortable hanging out that way. For a long time (I say long, a month) he would immediately roll to his belly and get very angry that he was on his belly. He has yet to roll back over, but he his discovering that it is okay to be on his tummy. We are all thankful for that! Since this post, he has started rolling all over and is now mastering sitting!

Picture post hopefully to follow!